Walking through the fire of self-transformation

September 30th, 2008

The process of witnessing one’s own intuitive compass in the face of personal turbulence is often a complex and confusing process…The confusion comes in when we don’t notice the patterns that continue to re-create the dynamics of our day to day lives. I’ve made some interesting observations as I’ve worked to create necessary changes in myself and some of my personal relationships in in the last days and months…

Firstly, as we all know, the process of creating soul stamina through life-changing paradigm shifts, can be brutally difficult—To be conscious of the nudging of our authentic selves can be an invisible process—One that may not be witnessed by those who understand the unique ways it may unfold. It’s important to find supportive, lovingly detached people to help navigate this leg of the journey. Another option is to journal your thoughts and feelings as a way of allowing free expression during those moments that can overtake you. I need to emphasize the importance of self genuine self expression. We often censor ourselves, and in turn, create more self betrayal in not allowing a true outlet to our needs and feeling. Speak it, write it and witness it.

Another observation I’ve come across relates to how we understand and recognize our patterns…We often can identify our patterns years before we actually shift they ways these dynamics play out. Until we do the hard work of moving out of our comfort zones, nothing will change. I used to almost believe that if I simply understood the ways in which I was not serving myself well, I could “text book” my way through the dysfunction in order to reach a new level of positive growth. In fact, I thought that if I would at the very least, show awareness and identify the ways in which I was stuck in my rut, I was making progress. I’m pretty confident that through my experience, that model doesn’t really work. You have to live it. And by “living it”, I mean that it’s necessary to move through the discomfort of genuine paradigm shifts within the context of how our lives are lived. This is a messy process—but the goal is authenticity, not peace (at least in the short term). Eventually peace is the byproduct.

The final conclusion I’ve drawn through my last several months of intensive self reflection, is that while it’s valuable and necessary to hold the intention of dismantling these outgrown patterns, it is not necessary to suffer or be in a continuous state of misery through these changes. In fact, I’d say that it’s *required* that we find as many ways to access our joy as possible! In those moments of contentment and fun, we’re able to truly feel our spirits and our connection to God. The more levity the better!! Eventually, the dust will settle, and as an added bonus, it’s possible that we’ve found new layers within us that have exposed new ways to unwind, be creative, or experience our bliss…

Maybe we can even enjoy the process…I might try that next time :-)